Life Help Now Blog

 

June 20, 2021: And the remainder was love

The many faces of LOVE are:

• STORGE=empathy
• PHILIA=friend
• EROS=romantic
• AGAPE=unconditional GOD LOVE
• LUDUS=playful LOVE

STORGE- liking someone through fondness of familiarity, family member or people who relate in familiar ways that have otherwise found themselves bonded bt chance. i.e. parent having affection for their child.

PHILIA- this is LOVE between friends as close as siblings. The friendship is the strong bond existing between people who share common values, interest or activities

EROS- this is being in LOVE or loving one, as opposed to just becoming sexual with one.

AGAPE- this LOVE exists regardless of the changing circumstances, selfless LOVE = greatest of all of these. This is more of a giving LOVE.

There is another twisted type of LOVE called PHILAUTIA- this LOVE is viewed as LOVE of self in the extreme. Narcissism has created much Chaos among people.

DEFINITION of LOVE:

Willingness to prioritize another’s - wellbeing or happiness above your own;  Extreme feelings of attachment, affection, need;  Dramatic sudden feelings of attraction and/or respect;  Fleeting emotion of an object i.e. vehicle, home.  The very first encounter with LOVE is in the birthing room and it is the act of giving that produces the LOVE. As life continues one can either be under the long arm of LOVE or have limited LOVE exposed to their lives.The point of interest is how LOVE works through the giving cycle. When a person gives and the other person learns through the modeling experience, LOVE is multiplied. Useless happenings begin to drop off of humans making LOVE the main concern when involved with the act of giving.

It has been an observation of mine that concerning Love. That is when Love is the most remembered and enjoyed. I am talking about the ‘playful’ kind of Love called LUDYS. This type of Love makes a mark in the brain because it is fun and light. The question is How does this work? Love becomes the center goal of life. People either reject Love or embrace Love. Mostly, the first 5 years of a person’s life sets the pace for the majestic display of what the child sees in life using the sponge theory that their life is watered by love or Non-Love and the sponge absorbs this or the sponge dries up. As life progresses a person can interrupt this perception of Love by becoming a giver. Some times the playful side is the most impressive side of love. Take for example, the neighborhood boys that continually vandalized their neigh -boyhood in the book DANGEROUS WONDER by Michael Yacannelli: The parents of a teen living in this neighborhood decided to engage the young vandals by using playfulness and hiding behind a large oak tree and waiting until the teens arrived to do their destruction. As they arrived the Mother and Dad began to throw little acorns in the direction of the teens. The youngsters became self conscious thinking that someone was watching them and they may be exposed as the vandals. The teens did some sneaking on their own and came along behind the large oak tree and found to their surprise it was a teen friend’s parents and they yelled”it’s the Parents!”. The parents ran and yelled as they were hiding “you are it!” And played hide n seek with these boys. The neighborhood boys played/laughed and stopped the vandalizing. Love over ruled and set the pace for the most beautiful solution to a difficult situation.

Love continues to be the everlasting best feeling. Being a giver that knows how to turn a negative situation into a playful time of acceptance was forever formed in these young minds. What a wonder filled approach to love. May the reader create ways in their own mind to display acts of genuine love. Demands/commands create negative competition, whereas the playful approach created softness with a purpose.

April 1, 2021: Death is...

Death is

The end of an era

Death of a relationship

Death of a job

Death of a friend

Death of time alone

Death of summer flowers

Death of a sickness

Death of dryness

Death of heavy burden

Death of a marriage

Death of negative thinking

ALL of these display

The arching beginning and end.

ALL events have a beginning and an end.

Let us gain what we need

From every blossoming time

To make our lives rally with the climb.

Let us begin to expose

The benefit of the sublime

So that we walk in no regrets

That will simply make us fret

Longing to see the good

Will keep us embracing the best.

Death is… for us all

Death is…where we gain

Death is… not a fall

Death is… for us all!

To view the beginning is…

For us All!

March 15, 2021: Dreams and such

Maybe 18 years ago, I became interested in Dream Interpretation. It was not just any Dream Interpretation as in Secular Interpretation. Well, actually I had searched out Secular Interpretation as a young adult and later discovered that there were other types of Dream Interpretation. I was fortunate enough to attend some Dream Conferences and was mentored in this area for a couple of years. The focus that was used was from a Biblical nature. As the teaching progressed, I was able to see some of the differences in Secular/Biblical Interpretations. The Bible became the point of reference for what the Dreamer was dreaming. The helpful part of this interpretation was that I was able to help some of my Clients that thought they were inside of a Nightmare. When they heard the interpretation, they began to have a greater understanding of what was being said in their Dream. Not all Dreams are from GOD, but most are. Dreams are filled with metaphors which have been known to confuse the Dreamer. The main reason that they think the Dream is truly going to happen is that the Dreams are so vivid. For example: People have stated that they have dreamed that a "loved one" was going to die or was dead in the Dream. Of course, I am only giving a portion of the Dream and there could be even more to the Dream. Many times, the pending death or death represents the end of one chapter of life and the beginning of another chapter of life. Naturally, the Dreamer is relieved and is interested to hear the remainder of the Dream interpretation.

You say: What is the purpose of Dreaming? Of course, there are several reasons and sometimes just hearing the Interpretation will help you to understand. I recall the Founder John Paul Jackson taking naps to get a solution to a problem that he was facing. His friend Group learned of this and took the liberty to tell their situational concern and ask John Paul would he go take a nap and get the answer for them. Actually he did many times. The friends began to nap on their own and did not need to ask any more. (I believe that is one of the most unique reasons for Dreaming.) Dream Interpretation does have some literal Interpretation, however the majority of Interpretations are using metaphors. The parables in the Bible are full of metaphors for our own Interpretation.

The Dreamer is usually the focus of the Dream and their Dream language is unique to them. An animal lover will Dream of animals or even a loving pet. People that are not animal lovers usually don't have animals in their Dream language. Farmers Dream of their beloved farm life and usually photographers Dream of their hobby/business. A Dream language is built gradually over time and the Dreamer can begin to recognize some of their own specific metaphors. Dream codes that originated from the Biblical vantage point have messages from God in them.

Several times, a Client would be fearful of going to sleep at night because of Dreaming. This has been known to end when the Dreamer sees the hope in their Dream. My recommendation for the Dreamer:

1. Write down your Dream as soon as you awaken
2. Read it over later in the day
3. Notice where you were in the dream
4. Realize that the metaphors are handpicked for you

Dream Interpretation is an interesting sideline and the Dreamer usually walks away more informed about their life than earlier. Some people have had Dreams that were so vivid that they hung onto them all through their childhood into adulthood. I would say to just embrace the Dream whether you discover what it means or not.

March 1, 2021: Productive Procrastination

When I was attending the great University of Kentucky working on my Social Work Degree, I had endless writing/reading. To relieve the stress of this going on for years of my life, I learned how to implement tiny little breaks that would refresh me. Some of these were walking outside around my house for a couple of circles, some were cleaning out a cabinet under my sink and the one that helped me the most was organizing my closets.( picking a different one as the assignments came). I gained techniques for organizing that I had not had before. My love for organizing grew and grew. Who knew this would be one of the benefits of so much sitting and reading/writing? My ability to sit for long hours grew over the many years, thus my skills of learning to entertain myself with organizing or just listening to what my need was at the time. I certainly did not know that this technique that I used was already created by someone else. The name productive procrastination helped me so much to learn to manage and even eliminate stress. This time period was when I began to listen to myself and what I could do to balance my thinking into harmony. So I guess, I could say that what looked like avoidance from my school workload was actually me improvising the 'new' way to pace myself. This type of pacing developed into an approach that kept me interested in the reading/writing. I would recommend to the reader to find the small outlet to keep the mind from going into overload by too much sameness and adjust self to productive breaks. My final thought on this subject is that complaining or lamenting about the endless workload was not helpful to keeping me balanced, therefore I learned to rearrange the way that I was thinking. Reader, enjoy the workload and pace yourself based on what is healthy for you and your lifestyle.

February 20, 2021: The Joy Factor

JOY is happiness and pleasure mixed in together. It comes around when things look grim,unccrtain, in the now, unexpectedly, when we think not about yesterday or tomorrow. Sometimes JOY comes when we are thinking of Dreams or the desire of our heart. JOY keeps the body and soul youthful. Probably, best anti-ager possible. JOY supercharges our Dopamine and Serotonin. Dopamine is a mood regulating hormone which makes you feel motivated, successful, and productive. Serotonin, also a mood regulator that makes you feel calmer, happier, and more focused. These two hormones also regulate one's digestive system by decreasing/increasing one's appetite. So as you can te11, JOY is tied to these hormones. Some Beautiful Quotes of JOY:

If you carry JOY in your heart, you can heal any moment. -Carlos Santana

There are those who give with JOY, and that JOY is their reward. -Khalil Gibran

We have to embrace obstacles to reach the next stages of JOY. -Goldie Hawn

JOY is the Holy Fire that keeps our purpose warm and our intelligence aglow. -Helen Ke1ler

Find JOY in the journey. -Anonymous

JOY is untouched by circumstances. -Anonymous

The healthiest response to life is JOY. -Mark Twain

Where there is LOVE there is JOY. -Mother Teresa

It is not JOY that makes us grateful. It is gratitude that makes us JOYful. -Anonymous

Find a place inside where there's JOY and the JOY will burn out the pain. -Joseph Campbell

JOY to the world All the boys and girls, now JOY to the fishes in the deep blue sea JOY to you and me. -Hoyt Axton

2021, we are thinking that you can supply our time zone for the JOY FACTOR. The past has taught us so much and we have benefitted from our life experiences. With gratitude we see you 2021 as the place-holder for JOY. The best part of JOY is we can carry it any where we go on this journey. We can choose to be riled up by events or we can simplify by taking hold of the JOY on our path. I close by saying 2021, we are watching you and what to put in our memory books!

February 5, 2021: WHAT TO DO IF YOU FEEL EMBARRASSMENT?

How many times in your life have you said something or you laughed at the wrong time or you maybe did something that was embarrassing? I can remember a time when my Professor came out of the Lounge with toilet paper stuck on the bottom of his shoe. My dilemma was whether to point this out or to act like I had not seen this paper on his shoe at all. In this case, I was thinking what it would feel like to be in his place. There are certainly times when we have our own embarrassing moments. The question is: How do we overcome?

1. Lighten up with humor
2. Get back on the Roller skates
3. Stay in the present
4. Allow room for error
5. How would embarrassment look on others
6. See the fear

Something has occurred and the feelings of embarrassment wash over you and your heart begins racing, yes racing just enough to look at the incident through other people's eyes. Did I make a 'fool' of myself? Do they feel sorry for me? Do they think that I am inadequate or ill prepared? Do they want to laugh at me? These are just a few thoughts that run through a person's mind when they are falling prey to moments of embarrassment. First let me say that usually Adults that are mature do not stay at the place of embarrassment, however immature or childlike could stay there for days, maybe even years. learning to be an overcomer is of great value in a person's life. Let's look at the 6 steps to ridding your thoughts of embarrassment.

1).To lighten up with humor is a quick way to view the "elephant in the room" by saying something light about what just happened. For example: if you wore blue jeans and cardigan sweater to a Dinner and everyone else was wearing a dress and heels. You could lightly say: Oh, I thought we were to dress casual to your friend sitting beside you. Your friend might respond "sure enough!" and you respond by saying if you want any advise on what to wear to the next Office party just ask me because I know what looks perfect!" Humor keeps the embarrassing moment minimized.

2). Get back on the Roller skates is the best way to overcome a 'fall'. Keep on trying and the rawness of the moment will evaporate.

3). Stay in the present works in most situation because the event that causes embarrassment is now in the past. If you will think of the 'now' this will keep you much more level.

4). Allow room for error makes its mark in our thoughts when we see the gap between thinking that we did not live up to the standards of our own expectation and our performance. Our goal needs to be to not fall flat but to allow enough room for us to lean over. Giving ourselves mercy works.

5). How would embarrassment look on others is another way at taking the focus off of ourselves in the moment. After all there is nothing we can do about the embarrassing moment that just occurred. If we view others as if they created the embarrassment, we begin to view our embarrassment through the way that others may view us.

6). See the fear is usually helpful due to thinking that others see us in a less favorable way. We can speak to ourselves and say: "I have the ability to stay level and fear will not creep into my life!"

Embarrassment can be a fleeting moment for us or a lingering heaviness. The best we can do is follow these 6 steps and bring oneself out of the difficult moment of shame and redness. The better we feel comes from practicing and not staying in the situation. All thinking can be changed and that is what keeps one out of the trap of embarrassment. Continually refer to these 6 steps and watch how quickly you may be able to recover.

JOURNALING

Each year is a really good time to begin recording your feelings, thoughts, and stress levels. The art of Journaling:

1. To learn more about self
2. Exercise your thinking about pertinent subjects
3. Energizes your mood by regulating your emotions
4. Encourages immune functioning
5. Brings stress levels lower

To learn about self: As you write you can get self questions out of your head. Often times this helps one to process what is occurring and aids one to look within. The best part about looking within is to begin to see what one has not been able to see while the thought was roaming around in one's head. This can bring one to view a greater sense of self awareness and self identity. Writing down events that have occurred have been known to help in adversity and begin the path to changing.

Exercise your thinking about pertinent subjects: As you continue to write, one can keep the brain active. Many times this creates a boost to memory and even the capacity for increasing memory. The writing uses the right side of the brain that proves to be an opportunity to increase your cognitive ability and creativity.

Energizes your mood by regulating your emotions: Writing helps one to become more in sync with their needs/wishes. Journaling aids the writer in staying in the present moment. Often the writer will have an 'Ah ha' moment which may become cathartic and regulate their emotional state. It can promote a willingness to overcome what is making them feel 'stuck'. Research has shown that the writer can develop greater knowledge of self which creates an arena to new growth patterns.

Encourages immune functioning: The writer can actually reduce their risk of illnesses by strengthening their immune system. Creative writing or daily recorded writing has been known to fight certain diseases. For example, the journalist has a sense of wellbeing that is felt throughout the body and major organs respond well to this. Kidneys, liver, gallbladder, heart and etc. all enjoy the body that has reduced stress. (writing is one way that does that).

Brings stress levels lower: As the writer journals this can become a tool for bringing stress to a more manageable place. We already know that stress damages the emotional/mental and physical side of the person. Studies have indicated that as little as 20 to 30 min a day over a period of 4 to 5 months was able to lower the blood pressure. If the writer will establish a time for writing, they can begin to manage stress in a more meaningful manner and start to view stressful events in a healthier light.

So one can see the benefits are high, but you may say how do I get started? Well the very first step is to not pre judge yourself and no critical thought, word, or deed. Guilt is not allowed. The most fun way to get your journal life to begin is to buy a beautiful journal with a rather nice pen or two. (makes journaling more exciting if you have the right tools). When you write no real rules! You are writing to get the thought on the paper not handing it in to an English teacher. You can begin with I feel ____ because of ____. Be sure to actually write with your pen and not on your computer. The hand writing will stimulate your right side of your brain in the best way. Typing digitally does not do the same for you.

So to put yourself on a healthier path begin to supercharge yourself by keeping a running log of events in your new 2021 journal. Enjoy the long term benefits the journaling will give you.

Hope First

Looking at this whole untouched year ahead ... My Christmas Trees are neatly put away and my Hope for this year has been brought out. I look at her and I tell her I want her to be like my new roomba that cleans my floors automatically. I want to entrust my Hope with the liberty to go anywhere freely and as she goes she makes her pre- sense known. I don't have to look for her because I can see where she has been. She continually follows an erratic pattern that makes an unpredictable difference. Well, the more I watch her she encourages me with her moves, I am assured that she will make progress where ever she lands. I can not progress in my daily future if I do not feel confident that my Hope will be moving throughout my life with a useful rhythm.

I have goals, dreams, and plans for the future and yet without Hope by my side, I can not function. This Hope I am referring to makes the sequences of my life more harmonious and even more colorful. (Right now I see her as Blue= color of revelation or Orange the color of perseverance) There is a natural feeling of flowing movement that gives me confidence. Oh, by the way, I named my Roomba ADAIR and the name for my companion Hope is DREAM ON. Nothing can stop this writer as long as I have Hope moving gingerly throughout my life. DREAM ON gives me a feeling of everything is going to be alright. DREAM ON also makes me increase my trust in the process of daily life and that something good is getting ready to happen. I guess you could say that my expectation increases with my Hope. Don't want to be without her that would be like me vacuuming myself without my Roomba ADAIR's programing.

So with DREAM ON, I can begin to complete my goals, dreams, plans for 2021. Sometimes, my clients have said ever so gently that I remind them of a person that gives Hope. So I suppose the door of Hope swings both ways. I can give it, however I have to already have her before I can give her. So, in conclusion, I say "let's all continue throughout this year with the expectation of good things happening" Hope, I'm talking to you I need you to remain my companion and stand beside me for my daily input. I will continuously look for your presence.

So. I think that I will end by saying: DREAM ON is the Plan/Word for 2021!

Christmas-The Best Time to Rest

The Retailers put excitement into the air with the music, the advertisements, and the wonderful gift ideas that are ever present. Each person thinks about their people and want the 'just right thing' for their yearly gift. (Going here and going there) is the joy of giving and giving to their special person. Then there is the decorating homes and offices to get 'just the look' that one is hoping for. Food gets into the spin also by one planning, practicing, and cooking up a delicious dish for the occasions that are planned. As all of this unfolds , families start using up their resources, their energy and their time to make the end of the year the Best Christmas ever. How could the year become even better?

Let's look at how the reader could improve this time of the year. Making list earlier in the year to begin the search for the gifts that bring on a smile or finding a recipe that can be reviewed earlier in the year would make for a less rushed and calm close to the season. All of these simple changes would help one to become less involved in the compulsive "have to"! I have a genuine interest in how to stay calm and rested in situations. Resting allows your body to do more, think better, and become creative in designing solutions. Now exploring these ideas helps us to understand the value of resting.

When the body is rested, one can extend more of self by working, exercising, processing. When one is tired the thought processes are diminished. In war crimes where hostages are held, the captor talks nonstop to keep the hostage from being able to think. If the hostage can not think they are not able to come up with a viable solution. The captor usually shoots negative thinking of words to the hostage to keep them in fear and they will remain obedient to the captor. This relates to the Christmas hustle of gift finding if the person becomes a hostage to the buying they will not be able to come up with good solutions. Now the Christmas season has metaphorically become the captor to the buyer. They have to buy and become the perfect gift-finder which can use up hours of energy. So when a person learns to make a PLAN and work the PLAN, there is less possibility that the person can fall into the trap of not being rested. Resting is many times referred to in my thinking as an art. Learning to sit quietly either with a phone or without a phone is a good start. I have been known to tell parents to teach their young preschoolers to sit quietly and play the "Quiet" Game: Played like this ..... Mother sets a Timer and sits on the floor with the child for 1 minute and then the Mother gets up and tells the preschooler that they are coming back and to continue to sit without talking. The Mother returns and sits for 1 more minute with the child. The minutes can be increased as the child ages. 2-5 year old 2 min, 3 year old 3 min and up to 5 year old 5 min. This exercise teaches child and even Mother to enjoy the Quiet and the rhythm of stillness. All of these thoughts bring me to the entire concept of learning to rest which has sustained benefits.

May every gift have thought put into the gift that comes from a rested mind, body, and soul. Just for fun see if you can practice doing nothing, absolutely nothing for 10 min a day to reset your thinking. May this Christmas be your very best time of the year with the very best rest of your year. Merry Christmas!!

Chocolate Anyone?

I was considering a delicious 70% cocoa Chocolate Bar and how people seem to enjoy a Bar, sprinkled on their food, hidden inside cookie dough and clotted throughout different menus. Oh, how people enjoy their Chocolate. As I was thinking about this Chocolate, I began wondering how it became edible and what it had to go through for this to occur. My research brought me to Chocolate begins as beans that are finely ground up and then separated from what is called cocoa solids. They have to be fermented, dried, roasted then ground up. Of course, sugar is the most cherished ingredient added to the Chocolate form to make the Chocolate palatable.

My mind began wondering to 2020 and what people nationwide are experiencing. The difficult situation of Businesses closed, Day Cares closed creating children in the homes on a daily basis. Parents working in their homes remotely. Grand parents not being able to visit their families as they have in past years. Government Systems making difficult decisions and people having all sorts of opinions about what they are deciding. Then I looked at the Chocolate and what the process was for it to become anything edible at all. It didn't just happen; it had to be put through each step and phase and inspection to become the deliciousness that it truly is. You know, reader, fermented is not something that I would like to view because whatever is being fermented has to sit and gradually turn sour making the Chocolate look like it is useless and ready to be thrown out. Even the next stage of intense heat that is used for drying and roasting does not look much better. This writer is equating the process that makes delicious Chocolate to the pressurized transitions to families in their homes as very similar. The waiting, sitting, changing are not fast processes and yet they create some really effective results. These results remind me of how the Chocolate had to go through a process to become even worth eating. Have you thought about this before? What it takes to be effective and productive? The pressing could have good results if one looks at the good side of what has happened to our Nation. I guess what I am saying is I can easily see the negative things and I don't like them, however I have noticed that good things will rise up from difficult situations. Let's try to just see if we can find the hidden good things as a result of the changes that have occurred in most people's lives. The Chocolate would not be Chocolate if it had not gone through several steps to becoming what it does become. My thought for this Blog is to view your circumstance in a different light. The light that shows the good things that are forming.

Do People do too much for others?

There is such a "thing" called doing too much for people. Let's look at what that looks like. Sometimes people needing help continue to want your assistance even to the point of not feeling gratitude. This action turns into actually doing for the other person what they can do for themselves. It has a strange feeling to it because the person seems like they can not do the activity that is making them feel stuck.

How many times has a person blessed someone with a gift that turned into a long term obligation. I have had people say to me "Well they needed my help and I thought we were suppose to be givers and not takers. So if I am refusing to help people then I must be selfish." That way of thinking can create a negative environment and for most people this way of thinking can be changed. The TEST to clarify whether this person is actually needful or just feeling stuck is by asking some questions. What have you done? What are you able to do? Do they expect you to help them or is there a certain pressure behind the request. For example: is there a look of pity on their face or helplessness. The whole concept here is not to get involved in another's person's life to the point of over extending oneself. It is just fine to help until one is doing too much and begins to know that their answer to the other person needs to be a resounding "NO"!

The best form of knowing if you are giving or doing too much for people is to listen to your own body's reaction to the request or complaint. If you are beginning to feel uneasy then it is best to get into your 'self talk' and say: this is probable not the direction I need to be going into.

Learning to let go with a quiet NO becomes the kindest solution for self and even for the other person. These are some of the steps to better self care.

November 11, 2020: Fire in your bones!

Many times people walk through difficult situations and the way they view is unique to them. Wonder what the reason is that some people see torment one way and another person views torment another way. Let's look at this one young lady's experience.
Met this young woman that had experienced rape and became pregnant. This pregnancy produced the most precious little girl. The Mother was amazed at how her feelings toward this child was so sweet. She loved this child with an extraordinary unconditional love. This Mother discovered later in life that her ovvn Mother was raped and produced her. Needless to say the Mother was surprised to learn the same even occurred to her as her own Mother. The fire continued for this Mother when she discovered that her GrandMother that raised the Mother that this story is referring to was raped a man and birthed her Mother. 3 Generations of unplanned pregnancies with loads oflove for the baby girls. 3 Generations of no Male figures around to give input with the baby girls and only women raising these little girls. The most interesting fact of the Mother's story was that none of the Mothers experienced bitterness or agitation over raising these children.
Questioning the torment theory, this therapist noticed that this Mother telling the story thrived in the scholastic arena and appeared to have fire in her bones to achieve. Her apparent view of the world was to make the best out of a difficult situation and there was no looking back. Probably, every reader can look at their life and see rough/tough times and how they viewed their situation. The greatest question of all is can you get fire in your bones and keep it producing in the right direction?

October 24, 2020: What does Criticism of others do to you?

The very art of criticizing another person brings back lash onto yourself. To expound on this is look at the picture of speaking words that are filled with little droplets and when they come out of your mouth they go forward and some of the droplets land right back on your face. I like to view this picture as a reminder of what happens when one speaks about another person in the wrong lighting. #1. Now those ·words have been spoken about the other person and your ears heard the words and now they come back on you to walk in. #2. Criticism also can stir the person that is speaking the words up and create more disapproval. #3. Criticism, also sends a message to myself that I am usually trying to avoid. #4. Criticism may look like I am "better" than the other person as if I don't do what I am saying the other person is doing.
I called criticism an art and in that regard I would think the proper art form would be to not say anything against another or to focus on other aspects of the person. So when one is making a decision to speak about an event or person, the better response is not to malign another. The greatest way to remember is that those words come right back on you. Finding the better way to speak makes the self better.

 

 

October 6, 2020: The body keeps a record Part 2

As events occur in your Body throughout your childhood going into your adulthood, the Pancreas holds fear, the Heart shutters at the thought of Mommy going to work, or the stomach won't digest food properly because there is an atmosphere of arguing at the Dinner table in the evenings. These are all just examples of ways the your Organs register what is occurring inside your Body. If an event happens to be a sudden unexpected event during a developmental time in a child's life, the Body lists the event. If the event is not addressed it will show up on the Body called Dis Ease. There even have been emotions that have not been acknowledged such as anger and this will show up on the Body as Depression.

Writing about this Dis Ease reminds me of a lady whose little lap doggie died suddenly and unexpectedly through a horrific automobile accident. The owner could not release the anger, guilt, regret and fear that she was experiencing. As the weeks rolled on by, the lady continued to cry and moan daily for her little precious lap doggie. This became the meals that she ate. No words would help the agony that she was experiencing and the major concern was that this shock was going to be recorded on her Body and manifest into Dis Ease.

I will give some more examples of how the Body keeps a Record of Events. Again these examples have been researched by GOOD NEWS MINISTRIES in Macon, GA.

• Rheumatoid Arthritis=deep criticism from Authority, feeling very put upon
• Stiff Neck= stubbornness
• Stomach= difficulty digesting new ideas, dread, fear of new
• Tumors= nursing old hurts & shocks, letting remorse build up
• Ulcers= fear, strong belief that one is not good enough
• Weakness= need for mental rest

These samples of Dis Ease and how it will manifest on the Body is certainly an interesting study. My purpose of Part I and II is to point out how we can not live our lives without the Body registering the events on the Body. The cure, of course is a process and must be acknowledged to release the hold that the Event has on a person. The quick answer is to record your daily feelings and not to ignore what one notices about self. To begin to focus on what one might be grateful for and to live more genuinely in the present time and day. No more looking to the past and how it has so rudely penetrated your "being". No longer talking in past tense is helpful for the person beginning to have healthy thinking. The greatest key of all is to search out a situation for where the contentment is. To begin to terminate longing for things of yesteryear and begin to move one's mind to "now" thinking that , writes down organized Plans for 6 months, 1 year, 5 years from current day. Just know that nothing is hidden and if ignored it will surely show up one way or another.

September 22, 2020: The body keeps a record Part 1

Your Body is beautiful and ready to heal itself. Every portion of your cells and organs record what you do and it shows up on your Body. An example of this is found in when my children were in Elementary School, I would say to them as they were leaving for School each day: "Happy Recording!" The reason was to encourage them to get the most out of each School experience and I also knew that what they learn shows up later on their Bodies. So they might as well get the most out of their experiences daily.

Every thought, word, and deed was recorded in their Bodies and as they matured both mentally /physically they were setting their future in motion. Every argument, sleepless night, compliment, grateful feeling would be tucked within their Bodies.

I have had Client's experience emotional upheaval from their early childhood or even as a maturing adult that discovered that the upheaval turned into Dis Ease in their Bodies. I would teach my Client's that the GOAL was to be At Ease with no Dis Ease. Truly the Client learned that what did not seem to be a problem was actually making a mark on their Bodies that could or would become an ailment. Here are some examples of emotions gone haywire. As the reader will notice simple conflict turns into Dis Ease. This information is rendered through GOOD NEWS MINISTRIES Research located in Macon, GA. These examples are only samples of what may occur in a person's Body.

• Anxiety=learning to not trust the flow and process in your life
• Asthma=smothering love, feeling stifled, suppressing crying or griefs
• Back ailments=(lower) fear of lack of money
  (middle) quilt, carrying a burden
  (upper) lack of emotional support, feeling unloved or holding back love
• Blood Pressure=High longstanding emotional problems not resolved, Low lack of love as a child, defeatist attitude or what's the use?
• Cancer=deep hurt, longstanding resentment, deep secret or grief, bondage, fear of being trapped.
• Colds= Too much going on (need rest), mental confusion, disorder in home or life, small hurts.

August 17, 2020: What do I need to do when my thoughts move so fast that I can not breathe??

Seeing lots of people in my Private Practice that have voiced those very words to me: my response ... those situations of not being able to breathe originate from the thoughts that you are having or prior to incident they have had. Next comments were "I'm not thinking anything!"

Contrary to popular opinion: yes, there were many thoughts that were so automatic that it seemed as if there were no thoughts. Many times the thoughts were "what if?" this happens or "what if?" that happens. Stopping the thinking with a resounding "Not Now" will eliminate the "what if?" thought. Learning to overrule your thinking, the person will begin to have relief with their breathing. Sometimes the person begins to rev up their breathing with more "what if?" thoughts.

I recall a Client for more than a year frequented Urgent Treatment Centers or ERs with irregular breathing along with tightness in his chest. Multiple testing with CAT Scans, MRI, EKG and etc. with no heart disease or any other problems showing up for the Client. Client lost lots of sleep and began to lose weight due to irregular breathing or unable to get a good releasing breath. Client presented to this therapist and learned that his thinking was creating this full year of chaos in his life. He learned what he needed to do and problem completely resolved.

The interesting part of feeling whole is to keep your thoughts level and the breathing will match up in like kind.

August 10, 2020: Can stress effect you?

Stress can make you age, eat fast, eat very little, sleep much or little, upset the balance in hormones and functions of your body. The brain is even effected by stress by causing confusion, disorientation, becoming forgetful, indecisive, and even unmotivated. In the short version of Stress, the entire body/mind can stay in unrest.

The best way to overcome is to learn what rest looks like and how your body/mind respond much better when it is in the present, what we Therapists refer to as being in the "now". Your physical and mental begin to change, for example if you are noticing lots of crying from perhaps the loss of a pet the serotonin/melatonin levels will decrease. As these levels decrease the body will move into a range of fatique and gradually the the hormone levels will drop. Sometimes they will move into feeling like one has a weight pressing on them. As Stress builds in your body, other problems will occur as anxiety/depression. These come in all types of degrees.

Definitely Stress effects one physically/mentally. As a Therapist I hear reports of people going to ER and the Techs, Doctors say there is nothing wrong with you. Stress does not show up in a test, however the body will take note of it and it will show up in the body/mind.

The kindest thing that one can to for self is to learn to make lifestyle changes. Some examples: moving slower, changing the way one thinks, becoming cognizant of making adjustments to one's schedule to rest (even when one is working). All of these things are something that are a conscious effort. As one learns to navigate these changes they can be encouraged by feeling improvements.

August 3, 2020: What is this blog all about?

What is Life Help Now Blog all about? Hey, this is Brenda Fox Dixon, working for years to aid people to make their lives better by relieving them of their anxiety and frustration. I am available to answer questions about anxiety, things like what would make your life more productive. What can be done to improve your lifestyle, how to not be effected by trama, drama, chaos, and confusion. The best way to reach me is on this website page at lifehelpnow.net to ask your questions.

Every day continues to be a fresh start and working on your life to enjoy all the parts that come from the elements of your life. I am a mental health therapist that has people ask me on a regular basis, "How can I learn to not be operating in thinking about 'what if' I stay stuck in the negative place that I am? How can I have a quality life that actually is productive both in my vocation and in my home life?" Well, now you know how Life Help Now was birthed.... to help people (male, female, teens, even youngsters) to get the most out of their life. Life Help Now's purpose is to head one in the direction to enjoy and receive the most out of their life by finding contentment. Truly, contentment is a frame of mind that keeps a person walking in a place of fulfillment.

Join me by going to my website lifehelpnow.net and ask the questions that would head you into a new place of fulfillment.